Friday, May 31, 2013

American Idol Implosion (A Recap)

Did you hear the latest? The news is filled with tsunamis and hurricanes but leave it to me to break bad show biz news. After crowning Candice Glover as your American Idol, looks like the judges are leaving. Oh no, don't leave so soon. Three of them? Ain't that something? Here's an in-depth look at what they offered to the program (aKa Nothing!)

Randy Jackson Picture 31 - 2012 MusiCares Person of The Year Gala ...Who's that? No one but Randy Jackson. Randy had been with American Idol since the beginning. Oddly enough, I heard of him before his TV debut. During the seasons with Simon Cowell and Paula Abdul, Randy helped the trio become the face of the franchise. After they left, he was often left looking "right crazy" with his silly outfits and his horrible catchphrases. In short, Randy started to look like a damn dummy.

Fast Fact: Randy was going to be a mentor this past year but since Mariah Carey (Jackson was Mariah's manager) signed up, he stayed to buffer Mariah from Lil' Pitbull, Nicki Minaj's state of existence  For hanging in one extra year, I'm proud to say Randy Jackson is a friend. (Ring~~~~) He's calling me now, we've got some "projects" that are "in the works."

So it's come to this? Failing at a job that Jennifer Lopez did better? Now that's bad. When it was announced that Mariah Carey was to be a judge, I was cautiously optimistic. I thought it would be fine since she's still "kind of sane." Wow was I wrong. For being one of the most popular singers of all time, she could articulate many complex ideas. Or any ideas. Carey's real-life roadshow of self-parody didn't pause for American Idol. In short, she was a bad judge and she was distracted by....

This cartoon character. Really, these two made it tough to find who to root for. When American Idol signed Nicki Minaj, it was a calculated attempt to attract younger viewers and fans of train wrecks. It really didn't work and Minaj wasn't worth the emotional strain or the $12 million dollar price tag (Carey made $18 million, Randy Jackson was paid circus peanuts.) As for controversy, Minaj and Carey pure hatred for one another wasn't all that entertaining and bordered on pathetic. Oh well, it's all over--those two will never share a stage again. As for the same mental institution? That's a good question.
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