Silk Stalkings: Freudian Slip

You know I like Silk Stalkings. Late in the evenings after I send the staff home, I like to relax by playing Silk Stalkings episodes on my 8 track player.


Good news.This third season episode had oodles of fun. This told the story of an ex-jock with a crazy/wanton wife. The jock in this episode was played by Scott Geyer. TV fanatics might remember him as quart back No 13 or something from 1st and Ten. Here he's the former college teammate of our friend Chris. Rita and Chris saw Joe at some 90s party where they chit-chatted, etc. Of course after the visit, Rita spied Joe putting hands on his flirtatious old lady in a strong way. Oh no, don't tell me.






Despite his surname, Joe Mannes had problems with his ding-ding. They were zooming off down the highway, they stopped, had words and fought. That sad occurrence caused her to sleep with her sleazy therapist, Dr. Robin Anthony. The very idea...It was her last night of tossing and turning too, she wound up dead. Jezebel! At the same time she was getting burnt with hot candle wax, Joe was getting his ass beat in some dive bar. The circle of life...

 You know Chris and Rita got suspicious when they saw him all beaten and bloodied. There was no need for gabbing, Joe got arrested!!! Being the astute law enforcing folks they are, Rita went to go see the aforementioned therapist herself. Good thing, she's always been crazy. Although this was all work, something tells me Rita Lee enjoyed this part of the gig. She even arranged a date with him. Is she that damn dumb? As far as this script goes the answer is: Yes!

Turns out Dr. Robin (as pictured) left a string of murders and rapes all over Maryland. Maryland? Oh no, we were under siege! And guess what, the M.O. was the same as what claimed Miss Morgan. Even worse? Rita Lee was digging through Robin's chest of drawers and saw his stash of photos of women chained, tied n' bound. After a few words they ended up outside where Chris shot Robin in his back and front. Gone.

Good News: The last scene had Chris and Rita meeting a free Joe on the beach. He was reflecting and whatnot and he later said he was offered a job as a coach. I started to cry.

Where the Story Goes: While talking with Rita, Joe thought about her in her bloomers and had his first erection in 15 years.


Grade***

The Rosie Show: Cancelled

The Rosie Show: Debuted in October 2011--lasted for five months.Yep, five months.That's how the dictionary books are going to remember Rosie O' Donnell's now defunct OWN talker The Rosie Show. Despite the best efforts and on the spot retooling, it seems that this endeavor couldn't outrun one thing: Reality.

It seemed to start off innocuously enough. By the mid summer, the OWN network did a lot of promotion for Rosie's return to television. From the outset, it seemed to be disconcerting hybrid of mid-afternoon and late night fare that didn't serve either entity well. When the show finally debuted on October 14, 2011 that's actually when the viewer got. The first guest? The way creepy Russell Brand. This show was doomed!

In all honesty, the show never seem to improve during this incarnation. Everything was a struggle and a bit annoying. From the dancing boys, game show segments and confetti, the whole thing was an unwieldy, often unwatchable mess. To be nitpicky, even the set itself was ugly and in some light, it looked like the crazy makeshift talk show of a demented captors. That set does have history though. It was Oprah's old studio. And despite a parade of new "innovative" segment and guests, the ghost of better times seemed to just be in the eye line of TV fans. In that way, it was interesting to see a proven though mercurial entity like Rosie fail on the set/studio that was the home of most successful talk show host.

As time went on, the things that didn't work seemed to disappear. The musical director, the dancing boys and the game shows all went bye-bye. In January of 2012, the Rosie Show seemed to solve one big problem by changing sets, losing the audience and having a one on one interview setting. Oddly enough, it became a lot like what the Gayle King show was. The circle of life... O'Donnell seemed to be more comfortable like this she did get incisive interviews from everyone from Dr. Oz to Kathy Griffin. It wasn't enough.


  On March 6 with the ratings still tanking, she stated she was moving the show to New York. Apparently she complained about the lack of guests, etc. On March 16th (or 16rd) the world was rocked to the core as the Rosie Show was cancelled with little fanfare, sparklers or black market explosives. Rosie and Oprah exchanged public statements and I cried a river of tears at my desk.

Show Grade **


Update: Not surprisingly reports have surfaced that crazy old Rosie surfaced behind the scenes of OWN with tirades and abuse and stuff...

The Revolution Is Sadly Televised

Oh hi. Did you know that One Life to Live was cancelled. Oh goodness, let's not call it that. I don't know about you but I'm going to miss Doug Williams and Reva. One Live to Life One Life to Live was replaced by this turkey, the Revolution. Let's see what this show's about! Follow me!

The Revolution deals with self-empowerment and the big issues in an entertaining, multifaceted way. And not surprising, it's just as odious as the idea and the true meaning of that sentence. Clearly Gunn and Pennington are the most recognizable of the hosts and the ones who actually have a hook albeit a boring one in this context. Gunn brings his often fastidious and ambivalent energy to the proceedings. You can tell he's no actor because you can tell he often just doesn't care. The best thing so far is the fact that Gunn took up the show's precious time to tell us (again) that he's celibate and he been for quite some time. Well, we can safely chuck that in the Too Much Information files.

Pennigton's role is a bit sketchier. Without a work crew to harass or a house to build, the Revolution doesn't seem to know what to do with him. In one episode he was talking about his dating woes  and another he was back to his old ways, fixing up dusty old rooms. The problem? No one really has a set purpose here. In fact those master chefs, Tim and Ty were together in a segment making meatloaf together. Meat turned into loaf, how prescient, how divine!

The other help gurus here are just there. There's a chrome-domed exercise guy, a tight as a drum doctor lady and a sister with braids. While Gunn and Pennington aren't exactly setting the world on fire the other three work as well as gross of Tylenol PM. 


Here's a clip from the audience of the Revolution during a "fun" cooking segment.They look excited!

Grade: **1/2

Jillian Michaels Leaves the Doctors: A Nation Mourns

Pictured Jillian Michaels and a bag of healthy treats....


Do you remember the days when Jillian Michaels was on The Doctors? Good, because all you'll have is memories. My staff slipped this piece of news under my door and I've got to tell you, I cried like a banshee. It seems that after only one glorious half a season, the teaming of Jillian Michaels and the Doctors is no more. How did this happen? Let's investigate.

You know, I  knew something was up. I was watching the Doctors and I saw the original four coming on stage like they were the Doobie Brothers or something. Damn fools. Then I watched intently and didn't see no Jillian Michaels, no chair, no nothing. These jackasses were back to the way they were--I hope their happy. I'm not. I was so worried, I asked Jillian about it. We were laying together after (you know). I saw something about her departure on the television and I nicely asked, "You got something to tell me woman!" She didn't like my tone, rolled over and started to choke me. ! Michaels was a bit refined in a her statement about the matter:


"I have enjoyed my time on the show and the opportunity it provided me in my mission to help others improve their lives. ... It was a great experience and I wish the show nothing but success."

That couldn't sound more scripted could it? It's nothing but baloney. The Doctors rep wasn't any better, in fact they were a tad worse and said:
  
 "Jillian has contributed greatly to our show this season, and we value her talent and insight as she has inspired countless people to improve their lives. Although it wasn’t the fit we both hoped for, our original four doctors will continue to provide our audience with the gold standard medical content we've delivered since our show’s inception. Jillian will always be a part of 'The Doctors' family."


Bullshit! And really what was the fit they hoped for? I guess I'll have to wait for the miniseries....


My Take: How this split happened is simple: The chemistry sucked on a day-to-day basis. It seems that the powers-that-be liked Jillian shaking things up now and then. Regularly? Nope. Now we're back to these four and their staggeringly dull show. Goody!