Friday, March 09, 2012

Jillian Michaels Leaves the Doctors: A Nation Mourns



Pictured Jillian Michaels and a bag of healthy treats....


Do you remember the days when Jillian Michaels was on The Doctors? Good, because all you'll have is memories. My staff slipped this piece of news under my door and I've got to tell you, I cried like a banshee. It seems that after only one glorious half a season, the teaming of Jillian Michaels and the Doctors is no more. How did this happen? Let's investigate.









You know, I  knew something was up. I was watching the Doctors and I saw the original four coming on stage like they were the Doobie Brothers or something. Damn fools. Then I watched intently and didn't see no Jillian Michaels, no chair, no nothing. These jackasses were back to the way they were--I hope their happy. I'm not. I was so worried, I asked Jillian about it. We were laying together after (you know). I saw something about her departure on the television and I nicely asked, "You got something to tell me woman!" She didn't like my tone, rolled over and started to choke me. ! Michaels was a bit refined in a her statement about the matter:


"I have enjoyed my time on the show and the opportunity it provided me in my mission to help others improve their lives. ... It was a great experience and I wish the show nothing but success."

That couldn't sound more scripted could it? It's nothing but baloney. The Doctors rep wasn't any better, in fact they were a tad worse and said:
  
 "Jillian has contributed greatly to our show this season, and we value her talent and insight as she has inspired countless people to improve their lives. Although it wasn’t the fit we both hoped for, our original four doctors will continue to provide our audience with the gold standard medical content we've delivered since our show’s inception. Jillian will always be a part of 'The Doctors' family."


Bullshit! And really what was the fit they hoped for? I guess I'll have to wait for the miniseries....


My Take: How this split happened is simple: The chemistry sucked on a day-to-day basis. It seems that the powers-that-be liked Jillian shaking things up now and then. Regularly? Nope. Now we're back to these four and their staggeringly dull show. Goody!


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