Friday, October 05, 2007

Danny Bonaduce VS. Jonny Fairplay: A Review

I got a sad report from the front lines. Non-entity and Survivor liar Jonny Fairplay and the legendary Danny Bonaduce had a fight in front of company. I was sickened--if sickened means laughing my fool head off.

Pop Culture Idiot Play by Play: Danny Bonaduce seemed to be "tore up" when he appeared on stage. He was wearing an ensemble that was vaguely like the faux country garb that swept the country in the early '80s. Anyway, Jonny Fairplay was dying a clown's death up there, Danny said something in the mike, walked away--Fairplay called him and jumped on him. Danny pulled a Reuben Kincaid and flipped him over his head. Jonny landed on the floor face first.

The Good News: Jonny landed on the floor face first.

Note: Don't take me word for it, below are some pictures that illustrate the horror and why Jonny ran offstage like a punk and subsequently had to endure 3 1/2 hours of root canal/dentistry/teeth stuff...

This is how Fox framed the issue during a telephone conversation with Bonaduce.

There we see exactly what Fairplay did. You can't lie about it, there it is--I'm going to be sick...

"I'm gonna teach you how to body slam/Hit me!"

Who knew that 1982 classic from Bootsy Collins would be so apropos, poetic if you will. Bonaduce had enuf and shook Fairplay off. That fool lost a few teeth too. Danny wasn't charged in this distressing matter that's brought America that much closer.
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