You know, who's to say what Hasselhoff is upset about. I'm his confidant, I think David is upset about Star Jones. In fact he called me and said, "Jason, I'm upset about Star Jones." That's proof, ain't it? Get off my back! In any event he wants me to get the real story out. I told DH, sure and then he brandished a starter's pistol and chased me out of his stereo room. Here's the finished product:
Jackass David Hasselhoff underwent emergency surgery in London Thursday after slicing a tendon in his right arm during a freak shaving accident. In publicist speak, "freak shaving accident" means he was zooted out on something or other, jumped up, fell down and hurt "hisself."
According to the scam, I mean, reports, Hasselhoff either injured himself bumping into a glass shelf or hit his fool noggin on a chandelier. Hasselhoff ended up with a bunch of glass in his hand (a tantrum), had surgery and will report back to that purgatory affectionately known as, "America's Got Talent."
See, that wasn't so bad. Here's the "true"story, I don't believe a word of it...
7 comments:
Reason number 2,783 why this is my favorite blog...
"...brandished a starter's pistol..."
purgatory seems to be doing well in the ratings.
I am sure hell feels real good right now
America's Got Talent is an awful show. Speaking of hell, I'd like to see a remote from there, I bet David's up for it.
AGT is god-awful for sure. He won't be complaining considering how little he has to do to get his paycheck.
I don't think I've seen a bigger attention whore than David in recent years. Did you catch his cameos during the NBA playoffs?
LOL Shawn. I missed his cameos during the playoffs, thank god--I've had enough of him, it's like he's gotten weirder in the past couple of years.
Exactly. Really weird. Like since the divorce or separation or whatever's going on.
Yeah, I can easily see "Hoff" taking some time off, and or being treated for "exhaustion."
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