Tuesday, April 11, 2006

ER: It's Still On?

Some people still watch this, some don't. We all can agree on one thing, ER has jumped the shark at least 32.5 times. Although "shark jumping" is often a show compromising endeavor, we see that ER has actually gained strength from it. So much so it's quite possible ER will still be on in 3010 with some mutant fusion of John Leguizamo and Paul McCrane 3.0 being the show's "anchor." Here's a brief look at show of the plot contrivances and wrong turns that would have hobbled a lesser show--or a better one...


Beep, Beep--who is it? Gant? Gant?!- This was a particularly gripping and manipulative plot turn. Omar Epps played supposedly hapless intern Dennis Gant. He was friends with Carter and Dr. Benton rode him like a pony. Long story short, as Carter ignored his friend to get lucky--and Gant's girlfriend dumped him; Gant had a date with a train. And ended up in the ER. They didn't know who the victim was--until Gant's pager went off. It was him. That still creeps me out.

The Good News: Omar Epps is on "House" not "ER." Upgrade...

Carter's in Africa, Part 15...How many times are they going to tell this story. It's not interesting. Frankly, none of John Carter's stories are interesting that's why I like him better gone. During recent seasons however when the show was actually getting good again, they diminish the momentum to "check in" on Carter in Africa. Thrilling. This stuff's so brutal, it made Thandie Newton seem boring.

We Get It: The Carter in the Congo episodes are pretty much like those "Barbarino Is An Orderly" deal. Noah Wyle's recent ER episodes smack of "contractual obligation." I know the case a little and I've got a plastic gavel. "Smack!" Noah Wyle, you don't have to do anymore shows. ER's rickety enough without these adventures...


What's Up, "Doc?": ER's credibility took a big hit when they cast Mare Winningham as "Doctor Amanda Lee." The problem? She wasn't the real Dr. Lee and was a psycho who never even cracked open a medical book. The worst thing? She became obsessed with Mark Greene. That's crazy talk!



'Rocket' Romano Never Stood A Chance This character played by Paul McCrane was a prick from the word go. A misogynist, a racist, and a jackass, Romano was ER veritable depot of bad vibes. And boy was he ever punished. On top of the hospital waiting for a donor's something or other, ol' Rocket lost his arm via a helicopter blade. His surgeon days were over, his reattached arm caught fire. He later got a prosthesis that was taken for punishment. No matter. While giving Scott Grimes the business about grabbing a smoke, another helicopter visited. And dropped on top of him. Oops, blooper...




Ladies and gentleman, Mr. Dynamite, the most exciting character, ever.... He's pretty much the Forrest Gump of shark jumping. Directly or indirectly responsible, Dr. Peter Benton let off sparks as a lightening rod for inane plot twists. And wasn't Benton a joyless and tiresome character. His face was pretty much frozen on pissed. Tell you what, I didn't shed a tear when he left. I only wished he took Carter with him.

"Editor's" Note: Look what I found on the up-to-the-minute ER bios on the NBC site. I've got this one. It's Sherry Stringfield, she's gone--again....
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