Sunday, May 08, 2011

The Sad Goodbye: Amercian Idol: Casey Abrams b/w Jacob Lusk

Oh hi. I had to tear myself away from a classy, barn-burning review of a couple of Silk Stalking episodes to comment on this national tragedy. Oops, make that two. The dismissal of two contestants the world was falling in love with. Sad to say both Casey and Jacob are gone. In case you miss it, it's time to let Ol' Jason to give you the rundown on these wily fugitives.
Casey Abrams- Forgot him already, didn't you? Casey was the hirsute jazzbo from Texas who enchanted the world with his singing, scatting and Tourette's like grunting. You don't have to be Dr. Oz to be worried about those wordless utterances, Casey's insane. For his audition, he sang Ray Charles "I Don't Need No Doctor." As the weeks progressed it was clear that Young Casey did need a doctor--a psychiatrist. After singing "I Put a Spell on You" from Casey's creepy brother-in-arms, Dr. Mongo, Screaming Jay Hawkins, it was clear Switek's taste was little more than "The Worst Mix CD Ever." "Your Song" and "Nature Boy" were a few of the hurl worthy performances/treats he added to Idol's fetid stew. 

Abrams's stint on American Idol was fraught with issues with his tum-tum. In fact he had to sit out an episode. You know what else Casey was notable for? The save. After an unjust and distrusting America packed Casey's metaphorical belongings on a stick and told him to hit the highway, the AI judges pulled a sneak. The news turned Abrams, red, then white--and later an off shade of green. He reportedly collapsed backstage and threw up all over Smokey Robinson (well he could have been there.) Despite all of the theatre, reality asserted itself and Abrams left the competition a few weeks later.

Jacob Lusk- Lusk was an early favorite to win. "God Bless the Child" was his great moment. Jennifer Lopez made strange jerking gestures, Randy had a coughing and farting spasm in his dressing room and Steve Tyler cried all over his vaguely matronly ensemble. Early on it was clear Lusk had a yen for R&B classics and songs of the warhorse variation. Songs like "A House is Not a Home," "Man in the Mirror" and "You're All I Need to Get By" are a few of the Time-Life classics Lusk offered up with increasingly diminishing returns.

During his weeks there Lusk proved that he was the one contestant who got worse with the more advice and comments he received. For all of his vocal pyrotechnics Lusk seemed to concentrate on a lazy mid range that's all but says, "cut-out bins." Aside from the canny choices, the Luther Vandross comparisons (unjustified) it was all over but the shouting. Lusk last episode had him clearly losing his mind, picking pop trifle like "No Air" to sing. The performance was a farce, he was gyrating like an old lady. For an encore he did the always vile Nazareth version of "Love Hurts." Good--bye. After he was eliminated, Jacob danced with Zombie Luther one more gin' and wailed/squalled until the credits rolled.

Editor's Comment: I'm glad they're (their, there) both gone. See ya!
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