Monday, March 14, 2011

Episode Review: Beverly Hills 90210: Injustice For All

I thought my work was done. My staff let me back out of the driveaway in my 1974 Torino knowing I still had tapes to watch and things to do. The people responsible have been "dealt with." When I reviewed "Up in Flames" I forgot there was a companion piece to that classic. "Injustice For All" is like Goat's Head Soup to "Flames" "Exile On Main Street."

Things we lost after the fire...Kelly was convalescing at the beachhouse. Little David Silvers was there so was her super-model mom Jackie. The emotional damage was extensive, the storyline dragged out like so much taffy. In fact, there was such a lack of stories the writers had to play out the clock and give Andrea Zuckerman and her asshead husband a few scenes. Did you know that they were going to spin-off those two for their own show. It was going to be called Valerie's Family.

 After the accident in question, the long arm of the law was coming down on Steve Sanders. You know his wheels were turning, he was going to slither out of this one way or the other. The one thing Steve couldn't escape this time was reality of what happened. If you think Kelly Taylor: The 5'3 Model of the Year looked bad, you should have seen the girl who got hurt with her. Yikes! That was some chill-inducing makeup.

Still Kelly also had emotional problems left over from the night. She and Brandon weren't talking for a variety of reasons, all corny it seems. Brandon had to escape and go crying to his big-brother Dylan. Brandon couldn't even leave him alone in rehabs! Brandon was asking for Dylan's Zen advice on subjects ranging from Kelly, Jennie Garth, Emily. What the hell did Dylan know? Even the sight of a Rolling Stones cartoon tongue shook him all up inside.

Our friend Emily made an appearance (another one!) Although Emily looked like a deranged flapper in the earlier episode, she looked really cute in this one. I don't know what Brandon was thinking but I would have dropped crying ass Kelly like a sack of hot taters and went to live with Emily for ever ever.

This is all clean-up work, Ian Ziering had to do most of the heavy lifting in this episode. He had a scene with C.C. Capwell/Rush Sanders and had to beat up Griffin Stone. Most demoralizingly, Steve had to again reheat the beans of his '65 Love Affair with Kelly Taylor. Did they have no shame? As part of his plea bargin, Steve was sentenced to spend some time with boring ol' Jesse Vasquez. Jessie had his fill of Rush's boy's inferal whining and gave him the dressing down on the decade. I love that scene!

The Last Scene: For some reason, Dylan got the last scene here. Valerie and Brenda's mom (WTF?) gussied up Dylan's adobe hut while he was in rehab. Nat was there too, isn't he a dear? Anyway Dylan got a letter that stated that his ratty little sister was in "trouble." Oh goodness. Will I watch tomorrow? No....

Rating ***
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