The Brian McKnight Show

For those who need a refresher, Brian McKnight is a singer, he has hits, mostly in the '90s. Like most singers of his genre, he's not scaling the upper climbs of the charts, hence this syndicated program, the Brian McKnight Show. The show consists of Brian clearly doing on the fly interviews with celebrities he finds remotely interesting. According to rumor, Brian tackles his "prey" injects them with a paralyzing agent and after they come to, they just have to talk. On the specific episode I saw (it's 1 hour?) Brian talked to about 8 people, 7 too many. It's so bad, I had to watch...

The Guests-  A lot of them. Brian tried to outcool Common, acted like he was a cross between Rakim and Laurence Olivier and then basically begged for a job singing hook like it was 1996 all over again. Heavier things took precedent. Celebrities were gathered in New Orleans for some Haiti stuff and Brian interviewed more folks. Mike Tyson was wearing an odd jacket talking his ol' bull like olden day. What a special language Tyson  has. He's like a thesaurus with every other page ripped out. Spike Lee said absolutely nothing and had to confess he wasn't just there for just Haiti but also the Super Bowl. He's just an old softy. Gabrielle Union was there, she didn't say anything especially important either.


The Guests 2:- Brian went to Hawaiis and interviewed a ukulele man. Sadly they didn't have a death match where the Ukulele Man wrapped a 1,000 dollar "goodtar" on McKnight head. I can dream. The reason why I watched this "junk" was because of El DeBarge. DeBarge did an interview, seemed a little nervous and talked about writing stuff. It was a nice moment until Brian introduced him with, "Putting light skinned brothers back on the map..." How gauche. Anyhoo, El sounded great, and made sitting though McKnight's corniness somewhat worthwhile.

Grade: **1/2  Dotched a notch for tomfoolery.

My Favorite Time-Life Pitchmen

Infomercials like the ones listed below are becoming a lost art. I mean, there's still a lot of them but they aren't good. You know Billy Mays still makes commercials? He's working more than Tupac. Here's a few of my favorites from the company that brought us Time-Life: Easy Favorites To Have Bowel Movements By...




Bobby Goldsboro- Pop Memories Of The '60s-You thought being in 2010 meant we could escape him. We were wrong. For this installment Goldsboro and Co. cart out a real load of corn, in such a staggering concentration, it’s enough to classified as germ warfare.

Goldsboro cuts a bland figure, in a boring ol’ shirt, pleated slacks and that thatch of fur on his dome that’s raised questions since Harry Truman was still with us. Keeping with the kind of known guy/boring lady, Sue Sherman (or something like it) is his guest host. She’s too young to have a horse in this race, what does she know about this music besides the fact she was probably conceived to "Winchester Catherdal."

Grade ***

Odd Fact: Bobby Goldsboro actually co-produced some early Bobby Womack albums.

What Me Remembering That Fact Means: I'm going to die alone.


Cuba Gooding Sr.-Sweet Soul of the '70s- This is instructive, fans get to see that Cuba Jr.’s innate silliness wasn’t acquired, it was genetic. Gooding proves an enthusiastic host,selling records that were hits when I was in short pants. In his commercial, Time-Life: '70s Songs That People Screwed To, I'm willing to bet I have everything on it. Not boasting, just saying. Again, we have a young lady on Cuba's left that doesn't have a doggone thing to do with the music featured. Didn't we go to high school together? Gimme back my Luther Vandross tape cassette!


Grade ***1/2


Billy Dee Williams- The Motown Collection- Look it’s Lando Calrissian, Luke Stern, or whoever he played in Mahogany. In this Time-Life favorite, despite his hosting skills, it's almost like Billy is playing a variation of the Berry Gordy he played in The Jacksons: An American Dream. He’s basically Billy Dee ‘Berry” Gordy. As haughty as he seems in this 30 minute torture session, you’d think Billy Dee was in the studio with the Temptations when they recorded “My Girl.” He wasn’t. He just heard it on the radio like everyone else. This is pure Billy Dee. The hand gestures, the exaggerated vocal inflections and sadly he unleashed a sad, old-timey dance step on the initiated. All a nation can do is cry.

Grade ****


Nice livingroom, heh heh...


Peabo Bryson- Classic Soul Ballads-This is a case of a singer who could possibly still be recording something or other. Instead, he’s on a couch in a fake living room set selling dusty 45’s like a neighborhood record shop. Sadly this commercial isn't available for viewing. In fact many of us wonder if it happened at all, like Skylab. It did and this commercial worked too well. After setting the mood of romantic ‘70s and ‘80s R&B ballads, the only thing left to do is turn off the lights, do a few perfunctory grunts and groans and make it back home by 9:45.

Sad Facts: That's really Peabo's end table!

Grade ***1/2



Tony Orlando-Romancing the '70s- Look it's Lionel Richie and Joy Philbin. No not quite, it's Tony Orlando and some hosting lady. I'm not even going to pretend that I don't like this commercial or this set. It's a staggering collection of 156 light-rock, pop, soft R&B classics. It's got everything from Starbuck's "Moonlight Feels Right" to stuff from James Taylor on it. The folks from Time-Life must have felt good about this, the commercial is great with clips of Helen Reddy, Captain and Tennille and that creature from space named Lobo who visited our planet from 1972 to 1978. Cheers!


Grade *****

Francesca Baby/Very Good Friends

Nothing but the classics for me. My 3AM viewing comes courtesy of a DVD that has not one but two Afterschool Special episodes, Francesca Baby and Very Good Friends also known as Bang the Turtle Drum.


Francesca Baby- This Afterschool Treat followed the exploits of one girl named Francesca. There’s no other way to say it, Francesca’s mom is an old-school ‘70s TV show drama alkie, meaning she's actually realistic. She spends all day laying on her can, chain smoking Eve's and boring the world with her smart ass mouth. Of course Francesca, the mascot of the Little Grown Ups, had to take care of her and her little sister. Sad.
Of course there’s a father in the picture somewhat. He is a periphery figure, coming and going, a shadowy presence, always leaving probably going home to his other family. Bigamist!

Truth be told, Francesca's no ball of fire herself. She’s old beyond her years. In my near sleep I thought it was Ellen Pomeo or Marcia Cross but it was someone else entirely. Lydia Farnsworth I think she's called (ok Carol Jones). Anyhoo, Francesca got turned on to Ala-Teen by way of a kind-of boyfriend named Bix. This didn’t sit well with Francesca Baby’s Mom. She was railing against it, smoking in bed, sounding off and of course, drinking.

Like many shows like this, this resolved itself too quickly. After seeing her kids cooking up a mock fire escape drill, the mother started feeling contrite and decided to dry out. Doggone it...


Grade B + I cried!


Very Good Friends


I have to say I had a difficult time not dozing on this one. This Afterschool Special debuted in the fall of 1977 and featured one Melissa Sue Anderson star of the Little House on the Prairie. While kids no doubt thought this might be fun-loving fare, this initial scene? A funeral. Fun wasn’t going to be jumping off nowhere!


Most of this drama centered around a lovable scamp named Joss played by Katy Kurtzman. She liked horses, the crusty ol’ neighbor, her tree house. You guessed it, she was doomed. This movie came from a book called Something I Had No Interest In Reading. Sadly even when we were enthralled with the witty dialogue, the bucolic view and the hi-jinks, the intro let us now trouble was coming. And it did. After near-misses in the stall, on top of big horses, etc, Joss finally met her maker via the tree house scene. And about that tree house. I’m no scaredy cat but tree house was high, it was Jeffersons deluxe apartment in the sky high. I was stunned when she fell, it was a long way down. I wish her sister would have gotten on her cell phone and called 911.



Despite the depressing subject matter, Very Good Friends was fun watching. Melissa Sue Anderson's character learned some life lessons and stuff and everyone felt better as the credits rolled. Well, I did, I fell to sleep.

Grade A-